When Your Friend Bites You

Our Little One had been asking for a hamster for a long time, so last weekend, we my husband finally said yes. This was going to be the first time we would open our home to a cute rodent, while at the same time providing him with an expensive house, special food, and a colorful playground. She named him Rugby (yes, you guessed it right, her older brother suggested the name, and because she loves him so much she agreed).

Rugby has not been in this home more than a week and he already broke this little girl’s heart.

Two days ago my Little One came running and crying (and this is not common for her to do), her finger bleeding and the words coming out from her heart, “Rugby bit me! It hurts really bad!” I did what a mother is supposed to do. Not panicking (while my son is reassuring me, “Mom, it’s going to be OK. This hamster is not infected with rabies…) I washed her finger like 20 times (maybe 30) and hugged her and put a band-aid around the deep bite.

I hugged her while she was still sobbing. Then she said, “Mom, Rugby was so calm when I reached to pet him. I thought he would never bite me. I thought he was my friend.”

This is one of those hard lessons to learn: When our friends (those that we thought were true friends) bite us, it hurts deeply.

They know where to bite, they know what would hurt us, and without thinking, when we don’t expect it, they bite and we just can’t believe it. And we soon find ourselves crying. It hurts. It really does.

What do we do? Should Our Little One abandon Rugby? Starve him to death? No, we are trying to persuade her not to do so (even though she is not speaking to him anymore).

And what do we do with the friends that bite us? Ignore them? No. Let’s feed them love and forgiveness.

Jesus taught us to do this. To love the unlovable. To love our enemies. To forgive over and over and over again those that bite us.

Peter Leithart in his commentary on Samuel says about David and his response to Saul’s hatred,

“Long before  Jesus preached the Sermon on the Mount, David had discerned that the Lord required love for enemies.”

Learning about His Perfect Love, under His sun, and by His Grace,



4 thoughts on “When Your Friend Bites You

  1. Awww…such a hard thing for a Mama's heart!! We got our hamster a couple of months ago. The girl at the store told us not to handle him until at least a week had passed! Of course, that did not happen, and the biting did. But, it will subside. Encourage your girl with our story. It takes time. Our hamster tolerates amazing amounts of handling…and he never bites. 🙂

    As for the analogy…it's a very good one. How true it is, we feel like retreating when we've been hurt, but we are called to love and forgive. Impossible to do on our own, but with God, nothing is impossible. How wonderful HE is!

    Blessings to you!


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