On Titus 2: 1-5 Living the Gospel in Community -part 1-

 

“But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine. Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.” Titus 2: 1-5 ESV

We live what we believe in our community. We just can’t live a godly life in isolation; we live and move among people: believers and non believers as well. We have heard so many times that “our relationship with God is personal,” and while this is true in an extent, it has been carried too far as to deny our responsibility on how we live among the people around us, especially our brothers and sisters in the Lord.

In these verses Paul urges Titus, a young man, to teach in the church.  But there are some guidelines he must follow; first of all, he is to teach in accord with sound doctrine. Bryan Chapell explains in a few words what sound doctrine is:

“The words ‘sound doctrine’ are used by Paul to refer to the teachings passed on approved by Christ’s apostles, teachings meant to guard and guide the church.”

And John MacArthur says,

“[T]he theme throughout not only Titus but 1 and 2 Timothy is the teaching of sound doctrine and the call for consequent sound living, healthy doctrine which produces healthy living. That’s crucial.

Now this is all set against the backdrop of unsound doctrine which produces unsound living, or unhealthy doctrine which produces unhealthy Christianity.”

 

“So holy living is proper. Holy living is suitable. Holy living is fitting. Holy living is inseparable from sound doctrine. That’s the point.”

I firmly believe that the importance of having sound doctrine is not necessarily to crush someone else’s arguments, win debates, point out those in error and so on. The most important reason for us to pursue sound doctrine is that we may live accordingly to it. That we may live holy lives in a day to day basis. Down-to-earth-holiness, if so to say.

Instructions for older men are found on verse 2 and I do not intend to explain these, because I would never like to teach “older men” their place in the Church. However, I would like to point you to one sermon that may help you understand more about this verse:  God’s Plan for Older Men and Women by John MacArthur

Now we come to the instructions for older women -including myself-. These verses (3-5) are worth studying carefully as they are very practical and are a perfect guide that shows us how our sound doctrine must be manifested in our way of living. It is also a good way to help us choose our friends; we want to be close friends with women who display these characteristics.

1. Reverent in behavior:  A mature woman should always seek to honor God and demonstrate this reverence in all her conduct.  Our being close to God in prayer and through the Word, should be evident in all our manner of living.

2. Not slanders: No gossiping, not at all. MacArthur says,

“You know what the word is for malicious gossips? It’s the Greek word diabolos, 34 times in the New Testament it appears as a name for Satan. Nothing is more Satanlike than slander. And whereas men tend to sin and violently react physically, men prove to be rough or violent in their action, women have a tendency to be rough or violent in their words. Satan is a malicious slanderer, slandering night and day. Don’t be Satanlike.”

3. Not slaves to much wine: Not slaves to much wine or to anything that may not be reverent and godly.  We must not lack self-control. Any behavior that is out of control will certainly “damage the credibility of the life-changing power of the gospel” in Chapell’s words.

4. They are to teach what is good: And what is good? Those teachings that are in accord with sound doctrine. (v.1) Ladies, let’s take the big books and study, Let us go deeper in the Word taking the time to study it in-depth. Let us not be afraid to be Theologians, and go beyond our most-loved passages.

5. They are to train the young woman to…

* Love their husbands and children: Bryan Chapell hits the nail on a very important issue concerning young men teaching, counseling or giving advice to young women:

“Paul does not tell Titus to teach the younger women. This non-instruction probably reflects Paul’s concern that a young woman perceive her husband (or father-my inclusion) as the male who is her primary spiritual instructor (cf. 1 Corinthians 14:35). Paul also apparently desires to establish a pattern of instruction in the church that does not lead to sexual temptation.”

Older women are called to train younger women in the matters of family -marriage and child-rearing- What an enormous privilege is this! We are not called to preach from the pulpit on a Sunday’s sermon; we are called to train younger women how to live a godly, pious life that accords with sound doctrine in a day to day basis. What woman wants a pulpit to preach if she has a beautiful family to minister, children to teach, and young women around her to train?

* To be self-controlled: If we are called as older women to teach self-control, let us first of all, exercise it in our own lives.

* Pure:  It is true that many women struggle with pornography, but many more struggle with a false notion of what a romantic marriage should look alike. They are addicted to a romanticism that only happens in Hollywood. They are not pure, and in their hearts are not being faithful to their husbands, but are always in discontent, always wishing for a more “romantic” relationship.  This is not pure, and does not accords to godliness.

* Working at home, kind: These three go hand in hand. And it is important to note that real issue here is not if a wife can work or not outside her home. The heart of the matter here is this: Is her home her priority? If she stays at home what is her attitude? Kind or resentful?

Chapell has some good words here,

“Any woman who makes career status or financial advantage a higher priority in her life than the welfare of her marriage, children, or home transgress Scripture as well as the signals of a heart sensitive to God’s Spirit. Perhaps this is the reason Paul urges that young women not only be taught to be productive at home but also to be “kind.” A sensitive heart will not get so caught up in the routines of homemaking, that compassion for a husband’s or child’s needs get lost, nor will such a heart be dissuaded by the callousness of the secular world regarding the value of the homemaking routines.”

* Submissive to their own husbands: Because this is such an in-depth topic, I would like to poin tou to Nancy Wilson, a woman who has written several books on marriage and child-rearing, as well as some great articles on submission, for example this one: Stick to your Duties, in which she answers questions such as: “[W]hat about the women who are married to men who are not interested in leading, who have neither drive nor direction? What can a woman in a marriage like that do?”  (other articles are: Submission Requires Courage, and First Duties)

All these lineaments are there so that the word of God may not be reviled. I love the way Chapell concludes hos commentary on these verses,

“The wonderful message implicit here is that what happens in the home as a result of a woman’s care is a powerful tool for the progress of the gospel.”

Let us not be deceived, sisters. Our duties at home have an eternal effect; let us be diligent in doing what we have been commanded to do. Our joys will be multiplied!

Becky

A Love Song That Makes Me Close My Eyes When I Listen -and a giveaway-

When my husband and I got married, one of the dreams we had was to travel through the world together. It really seemed like an impossible dream, but we are grateful that God’s Providence has brought that dream to come true.

Friends always ask us which has been our favorite country, city, or corner of the world… we always say it is so hard to tell, every place has its own magic. There are many books that tell you all about traveling, and the 1,000 places to see before you die; and every time I see them I think to myself, “no matter where I go, or not go, the eyes of my husband is what I don’t want to miss seeing.” 

So, no matter where you travel, or not… make sure that you see into your husband’s eyes today.

 

 

Andrew Peterson has so many wonderful songs, that I am sure you would totally love. So I have decided I will give away a copy of his CD, Counting Stars, which also has another love song that I just love, Dancing in the Minefields. To enter your name in this giveaway,  leave a comment here and maybe share with us your favorite love song,  and -if times permits- a story on why that song makes you close your eyes?

I will announce a winner Tuesday, February 14

Becky

Related post:

Our Marriage, Our Dance.

Grateful for Our Love Story

Because it is February and “love is in the air”…

I woke up close to my man, and as he noticed that I was awake he held me closer. And just being there, in my favorite place to be, I kept thinking with my eyes half closed.

Isn’t this why waited? To wake up together in bed.

Isn’t this what we dreamed of?  To sleep side by side all nights, all of our lives.

Isn’t this the story we desperately wanted to live?

And now we are in it, we are living it. It is for real.

After all these years we are still making and living our love story, and I don’t want to forget that.

The dreams we dreamed many years ago. The words we spoke. The promises we made. The Yes-I-Do. The growing old together. All this is actually happening and I want to enjoy every second of it; after all, it is our love story. I am the wife and I am married to the man of my dreams.

Who have thought that the “And they lived happily ever after” is true, not because happiness is easy to have, but because the trials are many. The living-happily-ever-after, happens because together we have fought dragons, and walked through valleys of desolation, and have seen not only our physical nakedness, but our naked souls. Because we have not only said to each other “te amo” a thousand of times, but because we have also forgiven each other more than a thousand of times.

Somehow, when one has been married for several years, it is easy forget that we are living the love story we dreamed of. Why? When did we stop seeing the daily routine as the frame in which our love would grow stronger? In what page number of our story did we stop looking intensely at each other’s eyes? In what chapter did we stop getting excited to listen to each other’s voice over the phone, and long for a long embrace at night?

All good stories are worth reading over and over again. And when we don’t understand a part of it, we must go back and re-read, and find the missing pieces to try to understand. Why not going back… a few pages or maybe a few chapters and see what is it that we have missed?

Maybe a long kiss has the magic to bring fire to that love story again…

Maybe a yes…

Maybe a note…

Maybe an embrace when he gets home…

You know how you started your story with the one you love; reread the beginning and find, please, by all means find whatever it takes to keep the fire on. Do whatever it takes to keep dreaming and writing, and living your love story.

Today I am grateful, deeply grateful to my God and my husband…

#1489  for our beautiful love story. I want to keep on writing it with him… living it at his side.

Becky

>A Prayer for my Husband and a Giveaway

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He is my man, I love him and I praise God for giving me to him, and for giving him to me. His embrace is all I want, and being with him is a gift from the Lord.

Today I am specially grateful for my man, and for the privilege God has given me to intercede for him every day. He goes to the world every day,  and faces thorns and whistles and fights for us, while I wait in the quiet of our home, longing for his coming at night.

This is my prayer for my husband today. (adapted from Prayers of an Excellent Wife  -p.68- 69)

O thou Giving God,
Be gracious to my husband today, for to you do I cry all the day. Gladden the soul of your servant, for to you, O Lord, do I lift up his soul.

Teach him Your way that he might walk in Your truth; unite his heart to fear Your Name. Turn to him and be gracious to him; give him strength, and save him.

O beloved, sing with me of the steadfast love of the LORD forever; with your mouth make know his faithfulness to all generations!

Glorious God,

Let your favor be upon my husband. Establish the work of his hands.

Be his dwelling place, Most High, and be his refuge, so that no evil shall be allowed to befall him. Command Your angels concerning him to guard him in all his ways. Because You hold fast to him in love, please deliver him; protect him because he knows Your Name.

When he calls to You answer him; be with him in trouble; rescue him and honor him. With long life satisfy him, and show him Your salvation. Satisfy him with your beauty.

In the name of my Lord and Mediator Jesus, whose name is above all other names,

Amen

I would love to bless you with a printed copy of this book, if you are interested in participating in this giveaway, just leave a comment (please be sure to leave some contact information). I would appreciate if you pass the voice around by sharing this on facebook or twitter. (only USA, Mexico and Canada addresses)

The winner will be drawn Saturday June 25.

Under His sun and by His grace,

Becky

You can download for free this collection of Scriptural prayers here.
or buy the book here.

>The Sovereignty of God in Our Marriages -and my sin-

>I enjoy the long conversations my sister and I have on Skype. She is a godly woman and  a great teacher to me. I am so grateful for her life.

I want to invite you to be part of a recent conversation we had about God’s Sovereignty in our marriages and our sin. Yes, it is Friday, so get a cup of coffee and join us.

We know God is Sovereign, if we don’t believe that, then we are in big trouble; because the True God is Sovereign indeed!

Now, why is it so hard at times to live our lives under the sun trusting that HE IS INDEED SOVEREIGN? If we believe that God is sovereign (and He is indeed) then He is sovereign over our marriage life too.

What does this mean? It means, dear sister, that all the struggles you and I have to face in our marriages are allowed by God. He is the one who is permitting them to happen.  I am blessed to have a godly husband, but that doesn’t mean that we never have struggles. We (my sister and I) have talked lately on how we often miss the mark when struggles and differences in our marriage come to our lives. Instead of seeing them as instruments of God to sanctify us, we stop seeing Him all Sovereign and start to fight on our own flesh. At this point we are already sinning.

If we are mature Christians we should start dealing with the difficulties in our marriages from a different perspective.

First, let us recognize that God is Sovereign and that all these struggles are allowed by God only to deal with us, to sanctify us, and that at the end they will be good for us. Isn’t He, our Heavenly Father, the one who knows what’s best  for His children?

Secondly, just think how different things would be if in the very moment a struggle arises, we would take a second  before we say any word to see God’s hand allowing it.  What if we would recognize that this struggle is just another opportunity God is giving US to deal with a sin in our own heart?  What if we would stop seeing our husband’s sin and start seeing our own sin in the middle of the struggle?  I am sure we’ll start growing more in His grace.

Any thoughts of yours?